Miles to Go

Hello Dear Friends, I've missed you all! I missed coming here and telling you my stories. Today I will just dive in. I'm MOVING....again.  

What? I LOVE this apartment. I mean REALLY love this apartment.  How many moves does this make? Well, this is technically the second in 2020. But I sort of think of it as a New Year's Move. 

I was in the last apartment for two years. The one before that was about 6 months (?) and now this one is right at a year. And now, I'm moving one more time. 

I'm moving one building over to a top floor (instead of a 2nd floor). The new unit has two bedrooms; more than I needed a year ago, but exactly what I need today. The move is on Monday. Bill is moving to the new apartment too. 

I'm building a shared life. I find it interesting that, for me, the year is ending the way it began...with a move. Or maybe the new year is beginning the way this one did, with a move. 

I'll be honest, I could do with a lot less moving. I'd like to have all of the boxes unpacked AND the pictures hung for a few years. I think this next apartment will be good for that. 

In the middle of the planned move, we put up a Christmas Tree. It's a real one, and it's just the right size. And there are presents under the tree that I just can't wait to open. I haven't been this excited about the holiday in a very long time. 

The tree was put up a couple of weeks after Thanksgiving. It didn't make sense to buy a tree and put it up when the move is just days before Christmas. And yet, I wanted to be festive. So the tree is here and it makes me very happy.  

The star is Bill's homage to Vincent. Who wouldn't love a star like that? 

The boxes were packed today and the movers will come on Monday. The walls are bare now. As I see that the packing part has been done, the tension in my body softens. Seeing the packed boxes makes it all a lot less scary. And this time... I am not doing it alone. 

As I write this, I'm sitting in the dark watching the tree lights glow. I am quiet. The only sound is the dog's little snores from his snuggly place on the couch. Lines from the poem come to mind and I am happy. Christmas is upon us.

The only other sound's the sweep

Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep.

But I have promises to keep,

And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.

"Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening"
Robert Frost 

 

Life's Gifts

One last day off before craziness sets in. I have chores that need to be taken care of...you know grown-up things like getting the car inspected so that I can update my DMV tags. That sounds easy enough, but I'm pretty sure I need new front tires to pass inspection, so I have to add a chore before the chore to get ready for the chore. Technically, all three chores should be done before month-end. But, I often take advantage of the unofficial (unspoken?) thing that you get a grace period. All of that to say that instead of doing any of those chores I'm here at home. On my couch and basking in moments of sweet serenity.

Home is changing for me. It's becoming more lived in. More "can't wait to get there". 

Pictures have been hung. You know that has been a challenge of mine for quite some time. I can't tell you how happy it makes me to see pieces I love hanging on my wall. 

I had help getting them hung (as you knew I would). 

I thought that when I got my pics hung I would be staying in this apartment for another two years. But funny enough, within a month of hanging I've decided to move, yet again. 

I lived in my last apartment for two years loving it, but knowing I would love it more if my lovely prints adorned my walls. I moved before the walls saw a single framed picture. In my Wilmington apartment, I hired someone to hang pictures within a few weeks of arriving. The guy asked me, "How long are you going to be here?", to which I answered, "FOREVER". Spoiler alert, I did not live there forever. 

Now, a much smaller move will be taking place. I won't lament about timing because, well,  I'm excited. I'm moving into a larger apartment in the same complex. Just one building west, as a matter of fact. I will still hear the same birds singing that I hear now. But it will be a bigger place. "We" need a bigger place. --He and I need a bigger place. 

It's taken me a long time to truly allow myself to imagine my own future. It goes without saying that nothing in my future changes how I feel about my sweet Jordan. I love him now. I love him forever. God gave us a beautiful life together. A beautiful marriage. A beautiful daughter. A beautiful family. A happy and full life. Nothing changes that. The blessings of our life together continue. 

We now have a beautiful granddaughter. Our daughter and her Sam are beautiful parents. 

Jordan is a part of that because he is always a part of our life. Always. Nothing changes that. 

What changes is discovering that the heart is resilient and can still love. Can love again. 

As with most wonderful, spectacular, amazing life gifts, I cannot comprehend how it all fits together. How it all works. But maybe that's okay too. 

Joys of Autumn (even in 2020)

W

e've been given an Autumn Season this year. It came on time! Days began to become crisp in September with a few hot days sprinkled in. October has been a beautiful Fall; with days alternating from crisp and blue sky to cozy and rainy. 

Danielle & Lucy

Danielle asked me to visit and be part of Lucy's first Halloween. Who can resist this proposition?  It was a lovely mother-daughter-baby day. Lucy slept as we drove to the farm, which was a couple of counties over. The roads quickly became two lanes and were flanked by houses with lots of land between one and the other. A really peaceful drive was the backdrop of our hushed talking tones (so as not to wake the baby). We talked about little things as well as big. We talked about making a plan to vote. Danielle had already executed her plan and voted earlier that week. I love that about her. She is a good planner and once she has made a plan, it is always executed. I too planned to vote early and made sure I completed my plan within the week. 

Arriving at the farm just as Lucy woke up was perfect. She always wakes up happy. This baby girl is fearless. She can't quite walk yet, but she so wants to. And when we were visiting the cow, she did not want to be in her mother's arms. She wanted to get to the cow! There was a corn maze that the farm is fairly well known for. We went to see it and I will tell you the size was remarkable. Danielle and I hovered around the outside of the maze for a few photo ops.  We knew the maze was not for us as we heard people inside the maze saying things like, "We are going around in circles!"

I've begun to experience a few happy autumn activities myself. Earlier in the month I spent a weekend in the NC mountains, in a town called Burnsville. There was a B&B that was home-base. The town has a small "square" with a restaurant that served the best filet mignon and a decadent chocolate cake, both of which made the four-hour drive worth it. 

Photo by Dmitry Zvolskiy from Pexels

Mornings (after breakfast) were spent at a lovely coffee shop. The two-story building with wood floors felt every bit like a quaint small-town coffee shop. The shopkeeper even knew many of the customers' names. Upstairs were a few tables with two amazing windows to look out onto the square. Each day was spent near the window, drinking a vanilla latte, and listening to conversations that I wasn't meant to hear. A little bit of writing took place as well. --The old-fashioned kind of writing, with pen and paper. These types of weekend mornings are my version of heaven on earth.